“Imagine”, John Lennon’s sappy liberal fantasy song gets a nice redo by a group called Minnesotans for Global Warming:
Just so that you know what you’ll be getting we think it’ll be helpful to summarize what each of the U.S Presidential candidates think on the topic of GW. Here’s Obama’s thoughts according to Larry Elder:
Obama’s America considers global warming a dire threat to our planet. As withof the Oscar-winning film “ ,” they consider drastic action necessary to avoid catastrophe.
The other America agrees with‘ vice-chairman Bob Lutz, who recently called global warming a “total crock of s—-.” They support an analysis in the documentary “The Great Global Warming Swindle,” which aired in on the UK’s private channel 4. This America questions the extent to which man-made activity causes increased temperatures. They question whether the — mandating large expenses on industry to control — actually harms more than helps. Other climatologists/skeptics argue that many factors account for the slight rise in world temperature over the last hundred years, including, but not limited to, solar activity.
Obama’s solution: Force Lutz to square off on pay-per-view against Al Gore in an Ultimate Fighting Championship no-holds-barred death match. The winner gets to decide America’s policy on.
Hopefully this comforts the naysayers who doubt whethercan, indeed, bring us together.
This one hit about a month ago, but it was just too good to pass up. It comes from the oft-humorous The Onion and chronicles the advancement of “steaming black-guy heads” as an indication of climate change.
Steaming black-guy heads, the traditional sign of approaching winter for generations of football fans, have been occurring later in the season with every passing year, a fact that may be evidence of a climatic change with long-term effects on football itself, top scientists in the meteorological department of the National Football League said in a study released Monday.
“The phenomenon of weather-related African-American supracranial vaporous emission, or ‘Steaming Black-Guy Heads,’ as it is colloquially known, occurs when cold dry winter air comes into contact with hot, humid, shaven heads of football players, causing their personal water vapor to condense and rise on a column of heated air,” the statement read in part. “It is then observed by network cameramen, who overwhelmingly choose to film African-American players due to the dramatic contrasts that result—especially when the player in question is backlit—and beamed to millions of households during time-outs, replay reviews, and other stoppages of play. The viewers then realize that winter has come to America.”
So I pose this question: at what point should we expect to witness this phenomenon next season? Discuss.